How To Communicate With Your Officiant About The Wedding Ceremony

Tuesday, November 29th 2022. | Weddings

How To Communicate With Your Officiant About The Wedding Ceremony – As you may already know, I officiated a truly amazing wedding last May. Everything was wonderful: the couple was perfect, the daughter was amazing, and the photographers always rocked the world of the people who came into contact with them. All parties involved were over the top…except me. When I tried to sit down and think about something, I quickly realized that I needed help.

I’m a wedding photographer, so I spend a lot of time at weddings. I listened to a lot of officials and had a general idea of ​​what worked and what didn’t. The problem is that most of my weddings have at least thirty guests, often many, many more. The officials I usually listen to are a) professionals who manage all the time, and b) talk to more people than I do. There were a total of eight people at Kate and Bobby’s wedding (two of them were my husband and my son, who ended up going to the gym). Not so much.

How To Communicate With Your Officiant About The Wedding Ceremony

How To Communicate With Your Officiant About The Wedding Ceremony

I consult two sources when I need more information: books and the web. I knew which books I wanted to pull source material from (Bell Hooks etc.).

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), but I didn’t know what to think of to officiate a small wedding. As it turns out, the Internet doesn’t really know either. I knew I wanted something non-traditional, and most of what I found online was geared towards more traditional celebrations or went too far in the opposite direction (which seemed a little silly). I really wanted the ceremony to be honest, modern and for the weight of what was felt. I’ve actually read a few articles that couples have written for their vows (like this one) because I’ve found that the same reason I want my ceremony to be a certain way is similar to how couples want their ceremony. Adapted to them.

I finished most of the results as I went along, so I won’t write this. Here’s what I learned:

Frankly, I wished the script for the ceremony was a little more feminine. Not in a big way. I didn’t want to declare that men and women are equal (and I don’t need to: Kate and Bobby already live that). One thing I’ve noticed in many weddings I’ve photographed is that almost always, regardless of what the couple does or doesn’t believe, the man is asked to say their vows first. I spent the night digging around to find out why, and came up with nothing but “it’s a tradition” and “something happened at a wedding.” So I could be wrong, but I ended up tossing around the ancient idea that the man with the penis is in charge… and I immediately dictated that in a scripted ceremony Kate had to say her vows first. I don’t think it’s super groundbreaking, and I don’t know if anyone else even noticed, but I liked it.

I thought I was prepared for the rituals to fly by so quickly because I shoot them all the time, but holy kids. If you’re the person out there talking, it’s amazing how quickly this can happen. I had emailed Kate and Bobby a few times about the ceremony and usually knew what each of them was going to say, but when I rehearsed everything with my husband the day before the wedding, it was about fifteen minutes to the hour. When we got up in that yard and actually did it, it felt like five pounds. I was worried about being too detailed (as I thought I would be), but in retrospect I wondered if I should say more (probably not).

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If I could change one important thing about my ritual, I would go back in time and practice in front of people I know. Not people I know super well and feel comfortable with, but acquaintances I’m friendly with. We partnered with our neighbors on apartments on either side of us and they would have been perfect. By working, I mean we don’t all go out (although one of them does hike with my husband), but when they’re not home, we do things like pack, check on animals as needed, and talk on the trail. and through plants.

The reason I came back and changed this is because public speaking is not my thing. Even though I knew I was talking to several people, including my husband, my son, and two billion photographers, I was still very nervous about a couple I had been friends with online for years. I was worried that my voice would shake or my hands would shake (although no one would have noticed if they had). What I write and plan is actually good and appropriate, or my husband says, “That’s great!” I didn’t know what you said. Being nice (although it’s usually quite honest). In short, I was nervous and it would be a good idea to practice with people I knew.

My husband knows that I love (love, love, love) to talk about (not everything) I know, so the first thing he said to me when I told him was, “Cool! You know you have to do it again

How To Communicate With Your Officiant About The Wedding Ceremony

, right? ” I was offended for a hot minute and joked about how that would definitely happen

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They’re the ones to get married, and then I realized that my first three designs were all about me. So I jumped in with Kate and Bobby and emailed them with a series of questions so I could learn as much as I could about their relationship. Salesman: That totally helped.

Although it may sound obvious, as the host you must make sure that you add a personal touch to the ceremony itself – the rough and tumble of the relationship. Kate and Bobby have always been friends before dating, and the two have been tossing around the word family when talking about their evolving relationship. They talked about what kind of family they were without ever being anything else. I made sure to include these references, along with a shout out to their daughter Scarlett.

Stephanie is a photographer, writer and lives in Ravenclaw, California with her family. He was accustomed to reading, traveling, and tending animals to his heart’s content. Warning: All messages may contain multiple punctuation marks and emoji (!!!???).

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We participate in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program and other related programs. These affiliate programs are designed to provide us with a means to earn money by linking to Amazon.com and their affiliate sites as well as other digital retailers. One of the most important items on your wedding planning to-do list is choosing your officiant: the person who will officiate your ceremony.

This is someone who can help you prepare for a lifelong commitment to each other based on what you’re looking for. They can be a source of invaluable guidance and support – and they will become the most important part of your marriage.

To help you through the selection process, we’ve put together some of our most frequently asked questions and answers about choosing an officiant.

How To Communicate With Your Officiant About The Wedding Ceremony

A wedding officiant, also known as a celebrant, is someone who can legally perform a wedding ceremony. It could be your pastor, a justice of the peace, or your best friend.

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Broadly speaking, you can find an officiant who can perform a religious ceremony, a secular event, or an interfaith wedding.

You may ask yourself if you want a religious ceremony, if you like to be traditional, or if you want to make some adjustments. And some couples may want help building a marriage that they believe is spiritual but not religious.

If you don’t have someone in mind to perform the ceremony, ask married friends and family for recommendations. You can also consult with the venue, wedding suppliers and your place of worship.

We recommend that you ask your potential officers for references and, if possible, check online reviews from other couples. The officiant must also provide proof that they meet all local and state requirements to perform a wedding ceremony.

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Once you’ve narrowed down your options, see if the officiant can provide videos of their wedding ceremony. Do they seem confident?

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